week 21: ghost

almost didnt make it on this one, i didnt know really what to draw.

there was the one of me hiding under my covers after having seen the movie poltergeist at the tender age of six or so... it was years, and i mean into my early teens until i was able to sleep in a room with a tv in it.

then there was the one were i was house-sitting for my ex's family and was constantly getting the crap out of me hearing doors opening and closing upstairs, hearing footsteps and the the security gate opening and closing... i later asked her mom about it and she thinks its the spirit of the man who died of aids and had left her the house. still it was unnerving as hell.

and then i decided on this, and a sone i wrote a long time ago, in which part of the chours is:

and there is not, enough air to breathe around here
in every inch a memory
i ask myself
what the hell and still doing here
i ask myself, but i dont know

basically its that the things that i am really haunted by are my memories, and that going back to certain places can be harder depending on the memory/memories attached to them.

my memories are my ghosts

when worlds collide

late i know, was supposed to be done awhile ago but never had the concept down the way i wanted.

there were variations on this theme but i think i finally hit upon what i was trying to say.


two worlds, two views, clashing in one moment of truth. two different realities that cant exist in the same space.

week 20: smitten v2.0

i love beer, its good stuff. just thought id share.

winter

this was suggested by a good friend, its based on how you can be years away from a moment and remember something that happened.

and in rare cases be okay with it, as i am in this case.

she said winter.

and i thought about this.

week 20: smitten

this one took a bit of thought for me, i had some other ideas, some that ran along the same lines as this one, some that focused on other meanings of the word, some of the darker meanings.

then i remembered this girl at borders.

im not going to mention names, who knows who might be reading this, but i got to the regester and my breath stch in my chest. i didnt blurt out " i love you" but i think i said someting equally lame like, "i like me read good...."

or something.

anyway, i managed to pay for my books and beat a hasty retreat, i did find myself looking forward to trips to borders after that.

topic 24: gothic

i saw this topic this afternoon and i had it right away. as you may have figured out, i have not always been the happiest of people, and after highschool my depression hit all time lows (with a few exceptions.) i fell into the "goth" crowd for a few years, yes i was one of those kids you see at dennys at 2 in the morning after hitting some club, hanging out in front of 24 hour cyber cafes, drinking coffee and smoking at all hours. there was more to it than that, i just really dont want to go into it. in the end it was a phase i eventually evolved away from as i got older i guess.




this was just another variation.

more trouble

okay so here are two more ideas i had for trouble, this first one is a real life experience, the one below is one that i have never put myself in a position to experience.

my ex and i were on the family plan for our cell phones, one month, near the end, i checked the bill and noticed a ton of text messages and quite a few calls to a number that i didnt know. when we broke up i asked if it was someone else and she lied and said no.

a few weeks later i found out the truth.


this one is titled, "who the fuck do these belong to?"

not an experience ive gone through, but im sure that many people can relate.

week 19: trouble

went back and forth all week on this one, had a few different ideas about what i wanted to do with it. i have some other sketches i want to post here soon, but i really wanted to post before tomorrow.

so guess the concept is trouble, it could have worked for danger as well, god i hated when she'd ask those questions, there was only one answer she'd actually believe and even if i thought it (which id didnt) there would have been hell to pay for saying it.

another response ive heard jokingly is: honey its not the shirt it's your body that makes you look fat...

no i didnt laugh either, i just kinda smiled a little.

seriously, ladies, please dont ask your partners this question, no matter how insecure you feel, there is not good that will ever come of this.

and guys stop asking if youre a good size "down there", if you are, you know, if youre asking youre probably not.


(just trying to keep it fair.)

girl interrupted, topic 23: Brown

just something that was going to be something else but became this instead, confused?

see i was drawing this, and i was thinking about how most of my exes share many similiar physical traits, emotional too for that matter. one of those physical traits most of them shared was that they were brunettes. hell one of them even had the last name brown.

it just really hit that i can do these minimalist drawings about things that have happened to me and that the girl doesnt really change much. this really makes me think.

special thanks to joy for her input during the art process.

topic 22: food

last weekend i went home, i visited my grandparents and we had dinner.


this might sound innocent enough but my grandfather was a prisioner of war in the philippines during world war 2 and as such has had issues with not finishing food on your plate.

this was a problem growing up as my siblings and i were pick eaters and were served by others.

and was almost an issue a few nights ago

i wasnt too into what was being served, and i dont eat that much these days so i ate light.

and he was all about getting me to eat more.

dellima

now my grandparents think i have an eating disorder when all i wanted was to avoid not having a clean plate.

cant win.

week 18: quiet

i was sitting in the coffee shop, a bad conversation was coming to an end, among everything else that was running through my head was 'another coffee shop ruined for me'. another was that the noise in my head was matched by the beating of my heart and the background din.

there was so much that i wanted to say, it all tried to come out at once and got stuck in my mouth, so i didnt say anything.

i got up, left and threw the coffee i had bought in the trash and walked a block down to the bar where i chain smoked, had a few beers and did crossword puzzles trying not to fall apart.