week 21 (51): phenomenon

And then she has the gall to ask me what I want.

What I want...

I don’t see how this fucking matters.

And through the shock anger shows its face.

I say OK.

Say you know what I want.

I say I want to be with you.

I say I want to grow old and change with you.

I say that I want to love you and…  and…

Fuck.

I begin to cry, and then she starts crying as well and I feel like an asshole.

I reach out to hold her, to comfort her and she pulls away.

I watch her cry and realize we’re weeping for two different reasons, me for us and her for herself.

Deep down this hurts worst of all.